below you will find a list of jokes. why aren't these funny, you ask? i'll tell you - jokes, in their purest form, are best transferred by word of mouth. i have avoided for a very long time chronicling my jokes anywhere, but i finally cracked when i realized that there are far too many to remember. if you are interested in hearing any of these jokes (based on the tagline provided below), contact me. there's good ones, dirty ones, ethnic ones, cheesy ones, offensive ones, and sheerly retarded ones all mixed in.
12 inches long and white
cows in a field
cow with two legs
cow with no legs
cow with three legs
cow without young
elephant tampon
elephant vibrator
pirate vacation
love, true love, and showing off
dad walking in park with daughters
johnny and the duck
russian, mexican, and american drinking
mexican and octopus
suitors for daughter
magic dildo
doughboy looks down
pickled bread
anorexic and yeast infection
blonde track team
sorority and circus
sorority girl and bowling ball
blonde's left leg to right leg
one-armed blonde and tree
french tank gears
ad for french gun
french tree-lined boulevards
polish burglar
ethiopian paratrooper
polack and gorilla
ethiopian falling out of a tree
epileptic and garden
irish wedding and wake
rope walks into a bar
man walks into a bar
man at bar pisses into a cup
pilot washes up in australia
teddy bear asked for seconds
elephant with three balls
rabbi walks into a wall
jews walking in the desert
chicken and egg
nurse, schoolteacher, and airline stewardess
sad new yorkers
mice screw in a light bulb
lesbians in the cupboard
bear and rabbit in the forest
cross a chicken and a duck
gay bar with no stools
helen keller driving
helen keller's dog
no women on the moon
white wedding dresses
blind a woman
a thousand battered women
woman with two black eyes
dead baby float
truckload of dead babies
10 dead babies
green and miss piggy
snow white's cherry
wolverine cookies
ohio slides into a river
bush and martha stewart
michael jackson household
neil armstrong and michael jackson
acne and a catholic priest
michael jackson and wal-mart
365 used condoms
7 year old girl cry twice
black stuff between elephant's toes
unga bunga
soong-wah!
leper and prostitute
jewish dilemma
grosser than gross vampires
grosser than gross grandpa
grosser than gross mayonnaise
tampons have strings
black guy who flies a plane
sexual position that produces ugliest children
your mom and a catfish
deer nuts or beer nuts
teepee, wigwam, teepee, wigwam
guy walks into a psychiatrist's office naked
brown and sticky
dog and a fox
panda in the dictionary
magic johnson in a wheelchair
chicks dig jesus
restaurant meal in spain
twenty-eight year olds
paraplegic on the beach
no arms no legs on the wall
no arms no legs in the ocean
no arms no legs in leaves
no arms no legs on doorstep
no arms no legs in mailbox
square root of 69
special olympics
special olympics #2
chinese dry cleaning store
nervous jesus
jesus and a picture frame
george washington's armies
fish with no eyes
opposite of christopher reeve
deer with no eyes
numb it for you?