He was 26 over par by the eighth hole, had landed a fleet of golf balls in the water hazard, and dug himself into a trench fighting his way out of the rough, when his caddy coughed during a 12-inch putt. The duffer exploded.

``You've got to be the worst caddy in the world!'' he screamed.

``I doubt it,'' replied the caddy. ``That would be too much of a coincidence.''